More Job Issues

Ok, so here is the latest. I was out in California at the home office and had a chance to sit down with the owner and CTO. What I was basically told is that while they want me in Bozeman, MT they do not want to sign a contract. Ok, no problem.

I am not going to re-hash all the issues with moving there....you can scroll through my blog to find them. :-)

In any case, I was going to write an email to find out that if I moved there what would the conditions be? Considering that this has gone through multiple iterations over the last year I didn't want anything to be misconstrued.

Here is what I got (exact quote from the email, though some has been omitted for privacy):

To be sure that there is no misunderstanding or ambiguity to what’s “on the table”, the purpose of this e-mail is to summarize with certainty what the Company’s position is in regard to you possibly moving to Montana.

Salary - what it is now
Commission - what it is now
Moving expense allowance - $7,500
Car rental - Company will pay the rent until Dec 31, 2006. None after that.
Housing allowance - none after August 31, 2006
Personal travel allowance - none
Common Stock questions - as defined in the Employee Option Agreement sent to you last week. Vacation and other benefits - as defined in the Employee Handbook
Assurance of Employment - Should the work environment change in Montana where full time work was no longer profitable, Skyline would use its best efforts to keep you employed by seeking work in other parts of the country.

Basically....NOTHING. So I replied stating that it was me taking all the risk and that I couldn't see the company as taking any real risk. So forget it. It isn't going to work.

The reality is that I'll come back here....and then probably go contract, losing my benefits, and then I'll look for another job. At least hDEFY in the DFW area there are plenty to be had, unlike Bozeman, MT. Who knows? Maybe things will work out. It's been an interesting ride.

Sick of Flying

Or rather, I get sick from flying. It almost never fails. Generally, with in one or two days after flying I get sick. And here I am, once again, sick. I take vitamins and stuff, but it doesn't help. I have to fly to Jamaica in 2 days for vacation and to be the best man in my friend's wedding. I do not need to be sick.

I've read studies that indicate that the air on an airplane is no worse for you than the air in any public building. What I don't know is who funded the studies. If I was the airline industry I would try to fund the studies so that they leaned in my favor, of course.

And who knows? Maybe the air isn't any worse. But what about all the surface germs? If I were to track how many times I get sick after flying it's probably be in the 60 ~ 70+ percentile. That's fairly significant.

Blow it out of your Politically Correct Orifice!!

I received this email from my father and I double-checked it against Snopes (urban legend site). I found it interesting, but I have read multiple articles that support this type of behavior and discrimination against American citizens, but oddly enough, not against Muslim’s. After reading this, go check out this link regarding an incident with the Marriott hotel chain and CAIR.

Again, this is on JBWilliams site:
http://www.jihadwatch.org/dhimmiwatch/archives/009249.php

Here is the email:

I Can Say What I Want, But Not You?

Well, what do we have here. Looks like a small case of some people being able to dish it out, but not take it. Let's start at the top. The story begins at Michigan State University with a mechanical engineering professor named Indrek Wichman. Wichman sent an e-mail to the Muslim Student's Association. The e-mail was in response to the students' protest of the Danish cartoons that portrayed the Prophet Muhammad as a terrorist. The group had complained the cartoons were "hate speech." Enter Professor Wichman.

In his e-mail, he said the following:

“Dear Moslem Association: As a professor of Mechanical Engineering here at MSU I intend to protest your protest. I am offended not by cartoons, but by more mundane things like beheadings of civilians, cowardly attacks on public buildings, suicide murders, murders of Catholic priests (the latest in Turkey!), burnings of Christian churches, the continued persecution of Coptic Christians in Egypt, the imposition of Sharia law on non-Muslims, the rapes of Scandinavian girls and women (called "whores" in your culture), the murder of film directors in Holland, and the rioting and looting in Paris France.

This is what offends me, a soft-spoken person and academic, and many, many, many of my colleagues. I counsel you dissatisfied, aggressive, brutal, and uncivilized slave-trading Moslems to be very aware of this as you proceed with your infantile "protests."

If you do not like the values of the West -- see the 1st Amendment -- you are free to leave. I hope for God's sake that most of you choose that option. Please return to your ancestral homelands and build them up yourselves instead of troubling Americans.

Cordially, I. S. Wichman, Professor of Mechanical Engineering"

Well! As you can imagine, the Muslim group at the university didn't like this too well. They're demanding Wichman be reprimanded and mandatory diversity training for faculty and a seminar on hate and discrimination for freshman. How nice. But now the Michigan chapter of CAIR has jumped into the fray. CAIR, the Council on American-Islamic Relations, apparently doesn't believe that the good professor had the right to express his opinion.

For its part, the university is standing its ground. They say the e-mail was private, and they don't intend to publicly condemn his remarks. That will probably change. Wichman says he never intended the e-mail to be made public, and wouldn't have used the same strong language if he'd known it was going to get out.

A Soldier's Point of View

I came across these videos today that were highly revealing. Some will support the war effort while others may support the anti-war effort. You be the judge, but take a few moments and watch them. They are NSFW (not safe for work) and contain some fairly graphic images.

http://www.filecabi.net/video/aintalltherestfu.html
http://www.filecabi.net/video/marinamortar.html
http://www.filecabi.net/video/helmet-cam-soldier.html
http://www.filecabi.net/video/iraqbootycall.html
http://www.filecabi.net/video/rooffireiraq.html
http://www.filecabi.net/video/Iraqipropaganda.html
http://www.filecabi.net/video/troopsfun.html
http://www.filecabi.net/video/ereverydayiraq.html

American Flag Still Flying Over France

A big hats off to Floyd Landis for winning the Tour de France!!! This marks the eighth consecutive year that an American has won the race. The previous seven, and record, were won by Lance Armstrong.

I'm not a big bicycle racing fan by any means, but I think it's great that we still have the American Flag flying high at what has been a traditionally European event.

Universal Truths

Or at least two things that I find highly amusing:

1 – any song that has been remade by a death-metal band, slowed way down and sung by a death-metal growling singer. I have a small collection of songs like this and it never fails to amuse me. Just try it. Take any song and play them back to back (the original and the remake) and see if it doesn’t crack you up.

2 – porn is always far more entertaining if played at about two-times the normal speed….but you have to have to have the audio. It’s the audio that makes it hysterical.

So go grab some popcorn, your beverage of choice, and load up the CD Player, or DVD player. You will be glad that you did.

Political Points of View

Here is a link to writer JBWilliams (same initials, but not me!) blog on political division in America.

http://jb-williams.com/7-15-06.htm

For the most part I agree with what he has written, though I am sure it will offend someone. Personally, I don't care if you are offended. Maybe you need to be offended. Let's face it, regardless of what some groups would like to do by constraining the freedom of speech, it is not a constitutional right to not be offended.

Based on his seven political divisions I fall mostly in the "The Constitutional Conservative" with perhaps a bit of the "The Moderate (Compassionate) Conservative" thrown in for good measure. I still maintain I am not a true conservative, though.

We'll Just go a Little Further....

That was our thought yesterday when we floated the Jefferson river. After stopping at a gas station to load up with ice, beer, water, and a little food for a snack we headed on down towards the river. Three of us had never floated the Jefferson before (me included). Only one of us knew the way and how all this worked.

We dropped one car off at the get-out point and then proceeded up the road to the put-in spot. It wasn't that far up the road. So we asked the guy how long of a float it was and he said about 2.5 hours. Naturally, that wasn't long enough so we decided to head up the road "just a little further" to see if there were any other good spots to put in at.

We found a spot that was a little sketchy, but we got in OK and started our float. Just four of us....all guys. We had a raft, two tubes, and one chair-raft-thingie that was meant for fishing, a cooler, two sippy cups, and a football. (if you don't know what my sippy cup is, scroll down or go back through the archives until you find the picture. You can't miss it).

We floated, we drank, we swam. The one guy that knew the float got completely hammered at about the three hour mark. We had to take turns "babysitting" him because he couldn't stay in his tube or successfully navigate the river bottom to walk.

We kept thinking that around any bend we'd be coming up on the original put-in spot, but NO! We kept floating....and floating....and floating...and floating. We didn't see anybody. We lost the road....or rather the road lost us since we were fixed to the river as it were. We did see lots of cool wildlife, though. Monstrous pelicans seemed to be the choice wildlife of the day and we kept "following" a flock of them down the river. I don't think I have ever seen pelicans that were this big. And of course, we didn't see another single person on the river. Apparently there weren't any other morons that were stupid enough to put in so far up the river.

SEVEN HOURS LATER we made it to the put-in spot. It was now just before 8:00 at night!! No way were we going to go another 2.5 hours. We were sunburned, fried, tired and generally wiped out. So we thought, there is no way we went that far up the road. The guy who left his car there got a ride up the road and sure enough it was only about five minutes further. Just five minutes tacked on seven hours of float time. Unbelievable.

Still Gainfully Employed

I guess that is better than being another welfare leach. Things with work deteriorated rapidly yesterday evening. I thought we had things worked out based on an email that I sent out and from the response I got, but apparently this was not the case.

I spoke to my boss in the early evening on the way to the Music On Main Street festival going on this month in Bozeman. Apparently people were now upset with me because of the dates I had scheduled to travel or be home on my down week.

If you read the previous post, I mention how most of us travel quite extensively. What I failed to mention is that we often travel on personal days (i.e. Saturday, Sunday or a holiday) so that we can be on-site to teach or do a gig. While I certainly understand the need to travel on personal days so that we can be at said gig, I do not agree that it should be company policy to eat our personal days when it isn’t necessary.

As an example, if I was a contractor, worked hourly, worked for the government, served in the armed forces or worked for just about any other company I would be paid to travel. I travel for work, not because it gives me a warm fuzzy to sit in airplanes and dick around with airports.

As I told my boss and our COO, if anyone came to me and offered me a job and said “by the way, it’s company policy that you have to travel on your days off which will effectively eat up at least another 30 ~ 45 days of your personal time a year without compensation” I’d tell them to fucking forget it.

So this became a big issue on which I pretty much told the company it isn’t going to work for me and that perhaps we need to reevaluate the nature of our relationship. I’m not threatening to quit, but I am not going to put up with the company nickel-and-diming our personal time away. I already work salary and sometimes put in very long days and weeks. Ask anyone that knows me and they will tell you that.
Then the account manager over the area is all upset that I’ll be gone again. I tell you this happens EVERY SINGLE TIME I go home. It’s ridiculous and I am fed up with it.

So I almost quit this morning….but I have to remember that it’s not a good idea to quit without another job lined up.

So now I am scheduled to go back to TX permanently. This should alleviate some of the issues. We’ll see.

I’ll miss Montana. I’ll miss the friends I have made here. I’ll miss snowboarding every weekend and the beautiful scenery that this place has to offer. But I won’t miss the headache of dealing with people getting upset because I want them to treat us (employees) decently and uphold their agreements.

Damned Frustrating!

I have been living in Montana for about a year and a half, now. My residence is still in Texas. My house, toys, friends, family, etc. are all still there. That is my home. I am here for work.

We have tried to work out a deal where I would move up here, but it just hasn't worked out (see previous posts).

Regardless of that, one of the agreements (amongst many) for me to be up here working is that I would travel back to TX once a month to have a "down week."

Most of us in the company travel extensively. It is not unusual to have folks racking up 100,000+ flight miles or be on the road for 40+ weeks out of the year. While I am a little more static than others, with being mostly in MT, I am still technically on the road for the company if I am not at home.

The "down week" is not officially defined by our company. The understanding, though, is that folks spend time at home to take care of their affairs and spend time with their family and friends while having some time to decompress from being on the road. This does not mean that you get a week off. You still have to be responsive to emails (in a reasonable time frame), take phone calls, etc. Think of it is a reduced work-week that you get at home.

Personally, I don't have a girlfriend or wife to take care of my house and things for me when I am gone. That may or may not sound like much, but think of all the little things you do to your house or place throughout a month's period of time. You might try to imagine cramming all of that into one week while you are simultaneously working and trying to visit with everyone.

So the whole time I have been working up here I have been fairly lenient with going home. I rarely have made it home once a month. It is usually six to eight weeks before I get home. I have been pushing a little bit harder after the big fiasco that happened several months back...but I digress.

So I have a down week setup at home for the week of 08/07. This is the week after I am taking vacation down in Jamaica. An account manager for our company has a potential gig for me with an important client that also happens to be back in TX. The timing may work out well that I could do the work the same week I am already there, thus not having to incur additional travel expenses for the company, etc. So he and I call my boss and try to figure out a way to make this work for everyone. The only thing I said is that if I am to put in 40-hours that week, plus drive time to and from the site, it isn't a down week and I want another week at home during the month of August.

This did not sit well with my boss and we kind of got into it. I know it frustrates him, but I think that is because he receives pressure from the higher ups. It frustrates me because I feel like the company is not upholding their end of the agreement. Sure, they say one thing, but then expect another. How can you not have conflicts with this type of behavior?

With rare exception it seems like I always have to fight the company for my down time in TX. I do not understand why this has been an ongoing problem for over a year. I really feel like being a dick and just setting up a string of flights that would have me home the first week of every month and telling them tough shit, that was our agreement. But no, I try to help out and be a good employee and the thanks I get is for people to get pissed off at me and tell me that I am not being a team player. Fuck that. See finger picture in post below!

And they wonder why I want a contract to move up here....

Bush Embryos

I was chilling yesterday while I read the paper and had a beer after work. In the paper was a brief article on the house voting to support additional federal funding of stem cell research. Before I go any further, a few points:

Many people criticize Bush for not supporting stem cell research. This isn't quite accurate as federal funding for stem cell research was allocated under Bush, not Clinton or any other previous president. It's also important to note what he is being lambasted for is FEDERAL FUNDING.... not preventing research. This means it's a question of whether or not your tax dollars pay for it or the companies have to do it with their own money.

Secondly, there are multiple types of stem cells. Most scientists are working with adult stem cells and trying to culture and grow them. The raging debate is over embryonic stem cells, which are the cells of an embryo before they have been "assigned" to become any type of specific tissue. There is a great potential for research in embryonic stem cells.

Now I am not going to tell you that utilizing embryonic stem cells is either right or wrong. That is a religious debate for which I don't want to get in to. What I will tell you is that it looks like the vote is going to pass to support additional federal funding and that Bush is saying he will veto it.

This makes me very unhappy. I think there is a lot of potential in medical science with regards to stem cell research. I think, that if the people elect to spend their tax dollars on it then it is a good thing (I might also add that I don't think companies that benefit from this should be able to completely privatize their revenue when they come up with something). I don't like Bush intervening because he doesn't have the same religious belief as the majority of the house. Bush hasn't vetoed anything in his presidency, yet. Why this? Why does he have to impose his ultra-conservative beliefs on the entire United States?

I do not think that having a sense of values and morals is a bad thing. In fact, I think our country has lost too many values and we are on a downward spiral. I think something really bad will have to happen before it gets better. But where do you draw the line? Our country is supposed to be based on a basic democratic process (though it's not a true democracy). This is one thing about Bush that I definitely do not like or support.

The Many Faces of bRad

When I was younger (and not that I am old, now!) I had really long hair that pretty much covered up my face. I also wore very dark tinted glasses (almost to the point of being sunglasses). So you basically couldn't see my face very well. If I was growing a beard at the time you could pretty much forget it.

I quickly discovered two things:
1 - if I didn't want you to be able to read me I could effectively go "stone face" and cut off about 40% of the communication factor.

2 - if I wanted you to read my facial expressions I had to exaggerate them!

so there were pros and cons on both sides of the fence. I also tend to use my hands a lot when I talk. Last night, during some beverages, I was called out a number of times because of my animations. While I don't want to post a bunch of facial expressions here we did make fun of some of my hand animations.


Here is me making a point. Note the slightly out turned pinky to emphasize the point. This has the same effect as me making sure that you know what I say is the word and yuo should listen to nobody else.






This is a WTF? It could also mean that I am open to listening to you.

Either that, or hand me the bottle....it's my turn!






I think we all know what this means.....

Global Warming Disasters

A couple of interesting facts were pointed out to me by my father that I thought all the fanatics would be interested in:

1 - whazzhisface, Mr. Gore, dramatically states that it is warmer in his hometown now than when he was a boy. As it turns out, according to recorded history, it's actually cooler now. How could that be?

2 - the number of tornadoes that officially occurred in Tornado Alley this year during the tornado season were......drumroll please..... ZERO. That's right folks. Not ONE recorded tornado in tornado alley this year. How catastrophic is that?

3 - all of these scientist that agree with each other are talking about the ice shelfs breaking off and raising the sea level. Let's think about that for a moment. The ice shelf is FLOATING in the ocean. Let's try an experiment:
Take a glass of water
Put in a cube or two of ice
Mark the water level
Let the ice melt.
What happened? My guess is that unless you have aliens in your freezer making your ice cubes, you noticed that the water level didn't change. How odd. How is it that Gore and his scientists defy the laws of physics?

Moving to Montana Now....

Or not. As the case may be. Negotiations seem to have fallen apart between me and my company. So for the time being I am not leaving Montana, but I am not moving here either.

Floating the Madison

Yesterday I did my first river float in Montana. I have floated the rivers in Texas before, but this is a bit different. It's a lot longer and much cleaner than the rivers in Texas.

Prior to the float I had to go and buy a new pair of swimtrunks as I can't find my speedos. No, not those kind of speedos....it's just the same company. Board shorts seem to be popular, and I like them, but not for swimming. Go figure.

So we go to load up on beverages at the local gas station. I am without my huge-ass sippy cup because I left it in someone else's car. So I grab the biggest drink they have and make a Wild Turkey and Coke. My friend does the same thing and everyone else loads up the cooler with ice and beer. I heard a rumor that there was some water in there, but I was unable to verify this.

While shopping for supplies we happen to notice that a couple of the Baldwin brothers are there. Naturally it was the women that noticed. We could have cared less. "Oh...that's...um...nice." As it turns out they floated the same river as we saw them a few times throughout the day.

We had a good time floating the river. It's about a 4-hour float and there isn't any part of the river that I remember where you couldn't stand up. In fact, there were times when we were dragging bottom.

My friend, Dusty, and I were on Cooler duty. We kept it floating upright and got beverages in and out of the cooler for everyone. The only problem is that when I wasn't on cooler duty we somehow ended up upside down (Dusty and I both) and then I saw all the stuff floating down the river. This upset me a bit as I do not like to litter in such a beautiful area.

We were able to recover most of the beverages and ended the float with some minor scrapes, bruises, and good sunburns.

Afterwards we did a small cookout at the casa. Everyone was pretty whooped.....

Freaking Noise!!

I have never been anywhere where it is this noisey all the time. You would think it would be nice and peaceful around here....but noooooooo!

I'm a bit of an insomniac. I have a lot of trouble falling asleep. When I do sleep, it's very erratic (perhaps erotic, but definitely erratic) and I often wake up repeatedly. So you could say I just don't sleep very well in general.

Everyone has a natural rhythm that they will fall into. It's called the circadian rhythm. If I was left to my own devices I would go to bed somewhere around 3:00 ~ 4:00am and get up about 10:00am.

That being said, we have to have the windows open because there is no A.C. Because the windows are open, the blinds have to be open or the wind rattles them all night long. This is not new, I have posted about this before.

If I am hydrating, as I was last night, I have to get up at least two times during the night to pee. you try sucking down a few liters of water right before you go to bed and see how long you can handle it.

About 4:00 am the sprinklers come on. This wakes me. It also wakes me up when they change cycles.

The sun starts coming up about 4:30am this also aggravates me and makes it difficult to sleep. So now I either have to close the blinds and windows and start getting hot or suffer through it.

At roughly 5:30am my roomies are getting up and moving about. It must be a northern thing but everyone up here slams doors. I'm not just saying that because I am irritated. I am telling you they just pull the doors two without regards to how hard they are shutting it. So WHAM, WHAM, WHAM all morning long.

Then there is all the construction going on. This kicks off about 6:30 ~ 7:00am. Big diesel trucks up and down the street, two-stroke engines, power saws, lumber being thrown around, hammering, nailing, beating, sawing, etc. I honestly cannot believe the amount of racket that these people cause and there doesn't appear to be a noise ordinance.

7:00am they start mowing the grass at the park across the street. Lawnmowers, weedeaters, blowers, etc. Fun fun!

My friends and colleagues start calling me about 7:30am. I think this is just rude. As a general rule I don't call people before 8:00am or after 10:00pm.

By 8:00am it's time to get up and I am now pissed off at the world and want nothing to do with my alarm clock, work, or anyone that will keep me from getting some sleep.

I haven't slept good in months.....

Just Some Babble

I posted this as a response on someone else's blog, but I heard a statistic yesterday that I found fairly interesting. Supposedly the median price that people can afford for a home that move into the Bozeman area is $150k ~ $180k.

Since I may be moving to Bozeman if I can ever get a contract worked out with my company I have been monitoring real estate up here for a while. There aren't any homes here for that price range. The lots start at about $130k and go up from there.

Most homes sit above the $300k mark and it seems like an average price for a nice home will run you somewhere around $400k.

So how are these people affording it? I know that most people here are getting their loans as interest only, 3 ~ 5 year ARMs. This is scary because if the interest rates continue to rise you are going to have forclosures all over the place.

Racism Continues

A friend of mine sent me an article in which it is pointed out that whites will cease to voice their opinion if it is contrast to what a black person is stating. The article goes on to point out that the liberals with all of their efforts to change the standards for blacks and continuing to single them out as the "most repressed" society within America is actually doing more harm than good to race relations in America.

Here is the original link

Crazy People On Airplanes and Penthouse

Let me take you back a few years ago. A friend of mine, and I, were on a return flight from a cruise in the Bahamas. I had the window seat, he took the middle and a guy sat on the isle seat. A few minutes into the flight he cracks open a Penthouse magazine and begins to thumb through it while the flight attendants start serving drinks.

After we get our beverages and are chilling out on the plane the guy completely freaks out, throwing the magazine into the isle, shaking the seats, screaming, etc. This was pre-911 and they had to drag the guy to the rear of the aircraft and subdue him. We never saw him again until we got off the plane.

Now let's go back just one week ago to my flight from DFW to Bozeman. One leg of this flight goes through Colorado. So I get on the plane and this older guy is sitting there with a Penthouse magazine. He must have asked me at least six times during a 2 hour flight if we were still on the ground or if we were there yet. Clearly he could hide his own Easter eggs, but at least he wasn't like the previous guy.

Personally, I find it highly unusual that anyone would read a magazine such as penthouse on a public flight. It doesn't bother me, but I don't think it's appropriate for small children that might see it.

So two flights, two penthouse magazines.....two crazy people. You be the judge!!!

More Global Warming Worries

While I was writing this Dateline and Tom Brokaw (sp?) did a special on Global Warming. It was great! They scared us with the melting ice and rising sea levels. They showed us how much Co2 an average family puts out. They talked about some things we could do to help reduce the Co2 output.

They didn't talk about the expanding ice caps.
They didn't talk about the fact that "nature" produces almost 10-times the amount of Co2 that people do.
They didn't talk about the fact that there is virtually no proof that Co2 causes global warming and that water vapor has a much larger impact on temperatures than Co2.

All that being said, is it a bad idea to be aware of it and that we should be trying to not impact our environment so much?

Questioning Your Govt.

I don't believe it's a bad idea to question your government. I don't believe that makes you non-patriotic. As much as some people think I am a die-hard Republican, that is not the truth. I found this blog that I thought was pretty amusing. I'm not saying I agree with it because some of it is clearly over-the-top, but some of it certainly bears merit.

Here is the original link:
http://gordon.blogsmith.com/2006/03/16/what-you-need-to-believe-if-you-want-to-be-a-bush-republican/

Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when DubyaÂ’s daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Dubya needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism. HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is a impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

Supporting "Executive Privilege" for every Republican ever born, who will be born or who might be born (in perpetuity.)

What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

Support for hunters who shoot their friends and blame them for wearing orange vests similar to those worn by quail.

Bush NYC Terrorist Plot Foiled!

While I was eating my lunch this afternoon I noticed that there was a breaking news alert about a terrorist plot to blow up the tunnels under NYC. Apparently the eight primary individuals have been detained and the plot has been foiled. Bear in mind that I had no audio so I was only able to read the "headline" captions on the screen and figure the rest out from the video images.

Since the threat of terrorism is not a real threat I figure that Bush has to be behind this. It has to be more of the over-all world domination plan that he and Cheney have been working on since grade-school. It certainly doesn't make sense that Muslims are aspiring for world domination and hate the U.S. They would never do something like that, being a peaceful religion and all. But Bush and Cheney have a vested interest in crippling the U.S. in order to line their own pocket books.

My french fries were also over done.....I'm not sure how Bush pulled that one off, he's pretty tricky.

A Canuck's Sarcasm on Libs

This is from Gary Reid, a Canadian writer. He sent this to my dad in an email and I thought it was fairly amusing so I had to share it.


How many liberals said they would leave if Bush was re-elected and didn't?



Shocking immigration trend

Date: Fri, 30 Jun 2006 10:17:29 -0500; Winnipeg Herald, Manitoba, Canada,

The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The actions of President Bush are prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and agree with Bill O'Reilly.

Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night.

"I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blast Rush Limbaugh rants across the fields.

"Not real effective," he said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves.

"A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley Cabernet, though."

When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumours have been circulating about the Bush administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR races.

In recent days, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers on Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney hits to prove they were alive in the '50s.

"If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies.

"I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?"

In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged that the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close to Cheney said.

“We’re going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps.”

Skydiving Accident Lands Man In Hospital!

Some of you that read this may remember a guy named JP that used to work with me here in Montana. A few months ago he kind of disappeared and nobody was really sure what happened to him.

Well I heard yesterday that he (recently?) had a skydiving accident. Apparently he blacked out or passed out on the decent. I don't know if that was before or after his chute was deployed, but he was unconscious when he impacted the ground which meant that he had no brakes or control. I heard he hit something and you have to figure the speed would have been around 35mph give or take.

All we know is he was care flighted to a hospital in Seattle with massive injuries and we think he is currently in a drug induced coma. So far, we can't figure out which hospital he is in.

JP, if you are still out there we'll be thinking about you. May you have a speedy recovery.

So My 'Priller Is an Alien....

That's what it felt like anyway. After 10 days of flogging the BMW my bike felt completely alien and strange to me.

For starters I was sitting on the bike, not down in the bike. Then there was the over-sized brake and clutch levers. They aren't really over-sized, they just felt that way after working the BMW levers for a while. Then I had to get used to the blinker / horn controls again.

And of course, it's a much stronger engine than on the BMW so when I gave it some throttle to go, the bike went much more quickly than I anticipated. All of that fanished after about 15 minutes on it, though, and suddenly all was right with the world again.

Happy Birthday America!

Another year has come and gone. America is now celebrating it's 230th year as an independent country. That's young compared to some of the places I just visited. Hopefully we have the fortitude to survive as a country for much longer.

I have to get ready to fly back to Montana, so I'll keep this one brief. I hope everyone has a great 4th with their friends and family. But, if you would, take a moment to honor all the people past and present that allow us to have our independence and freedom on a day like today.

Photo Woes.....

I am soooo sorry everyone. I was linking the photos to my Yahoo Photo Album so I wouldn't have to upload them all over again. Apparently, Blogger doesn't like me and I have a lot of problems uploading images so I thought it would be far easier if I linked them.

Well, Yahoo apparently rotates the actual image names (seemingly randomly) so they work for a few minutes and then the links break. Morons.

You can still go to my Yahoo Photos Albums page to see all of the photos:
http://photos.yahoo.com/apriliarider@sbcglobal.net

So now I am uploading all of the images to a new site and am trying to fix the posts. Please be patient and I sincerely apologize.....

And here you go….
Grand Total of 2542.2km (1576.16 miles)

Well, I saw some comments regarding where I was and if I took my adapters and all that stuff. I can assure you that I took them. It was very difficult to get online in Europe. I either couldn’t do it, or it was very expensive, or it was expensive and only on their computers. I don’t do public access computers because I know what people can do with them (security concerns).

I may repeat myself here a bit, as you read further below, but I still have a lot of thoughts running around inside my head about the trip. I can’t remember specifically what I wrote or didn’t write and aside from trying to edit my writing for errors I don’t want to change what I was thinking at the time I wrote it.

Since I wasn’t able to get online I made an effort to post the trip in “reverse” order….meaning you can read it from top to bottom instead of bottom to top as it would have come out were I to post every day.

If you want to see more pictures than I am including in the blog go to my photos site at http://photos.yahoo.com/apriliarider@sbcglobal.net I highly recommend this as you will miss a ton of good photos if you don't.

All of that aside, the trip was absolutely awesome!! I would do it again in a heartbeat. Maybe next year or the year after I’ll take another tour. The Edelweiss folks were great and made touring Europe and awesome experience. I almost couldn’t imagine doing it any other way. We met groups that were on busses and had been doing the standard tourist thing for two weeks. Two weeks on a bus seeing the regular tourist crap….are you high?

I needed the break from work. When on the bike I wasn’t able to think about much else. Sure, my thoughts wandered around a bit, but I didn’t think about work or anything else that was stressful too much. I even forgot what day and date it was. I didn’t wear a watch when I was riding. If the bike didn’t have a clock on it I wouldn’t have known what time it was….half the time, I didn’t anyway.

Everyone in Europe was very friendly. Except, as you can probably guess, the French. That was probably my least favorite country with Germany and Austria being my two favorites. The people and the culture are indescribable.

About the only major complaint I have is that we just didn’t have quite enough time to experience the towns as much as I wanted. Now, this is not to say that I wouldn’t do this again, but if you had to have something negative that’s it. For the most part I rode the longer routes every day. That meant that we were clutch-out (moving) by 9:00am and riding all day (sometimes 10 hours) to get to where we were going. Then we’d have some beers, shower (sometimes not!) and eat dinner. At that point everything would be closed so we’d have more beers and then repeat the process the next day. Only a few times did we get to walk around much and check out the towns. Sure, I could have elected to not ride on my rest days, but was there ever really any choice?

My trip was also a bit of a personal journey. See, for those of you that don’t know me I am pretty anal. I like to be spontaneous and have fun, but I also like some order to my chaos and disorganization. Journeying to Europe on my own to ride a bike across various countries was both very exciting and a little bit intimidating. I had to get beyond some of my own reservations about a trip like this to make it work. And let me tell you, I loved just about every minute of it.

For those that were asking, the answer is “no” I didn’t hook up with any German cuties. I obviously made it back to the U.S. didn’t I? I will say that the women in Germany, Switzerland and Austria are all very attractive. It reminded me of being in Montana…but not Texas. Why? Well, for the most part the Europeans are all very fit and have that “outdoor” look that I like. In Texas we sit around in the A.C. and eat fried Twinkies while watching the Jerry Springer show (at least that is the stereotype).

Again, I am glad to be home….. don’t fly Air Canada (the most convoluted F’d up airlines ever), if you are up for it then take a ride with these folks and see some of the world. You will be glad that you did.

Those That I Rode With:

There were approximately 22 people in our group. Of those 22 a few were couples and rode two up. I rode with just about everyone in the group at least once (there are some exceptions though they were not intentional). Here they are:

Mike and John – two Boston boys from the East Coast with thick accents and a great sense of humor. John is a bit of a mess, but a very likeable guy. I think everyone got along with him. Mike is also funny as hell and has the honor of grinding the cylinder heads on his BMW (read further). I rode with both of them on multiple days and often they were the highlights of my trip.

Carolyn – a really great rider who I rode with on a few occasions as we picked up the pace!

Keith and Katie – a really nice couple that was riding two up. Keith was hysterical and a smart ass so you can probably imagine that I enjoyed his company. Katie was a sweetheart and a real trouper of a wife. I wish them both well.

Andrew – While most of us were smartasses and what not, Andrew was the clown of the group. He always had something funny to say, and a penchant for good wine. He rode by himself most of the time, but everyone enjoyed his company at dinner.

Portor – This guy had been on multiple tours. I didn’t see him and his g/f much as they were usually off on their own. A nice guy and I’m disappointed that we didn’t get to ride together.

Sheila – very interesting lady that was celebrating her 60th birthday!! She has had some interesting carriers and travels and was always welcome around the bar or dinner table.

Jack and Georgette – another couple that I didn’t get to ride with very much.

Elizabeth (Liz) – Liz and I hung out quite a bit. She is married with a great husband and kids back home. Being a beginner she rode more miles with us than she had on her own bike. Still, she did great and picked up some good riding skills along the way.

Mike and Jo – another couple that was riding the tour. I didn’t ride with them as a two-up, but Mike came along on the faster “rest” days. Good rider and I enjoyed watching his lines as he carved up the twisties.

Ray (a.k.a. Tex) – When I first met Ray, I didn’t like him. But as it turned out he was hysterical and a great Good ‘Ol Boy from Texas. He is in his 60’s and seeing as much of the world as he can while he can still do it. He was the one guy that would always come out with some off the wall comment that would get us all rolling.

Bill and Sue – a Texas couple that I ended up never riding with. That’s ironic because it was the one couple from Texas that I emailed and was going to ride with.

Nick – a last minute fill in from Uganda in South Africa!!! Nick was great to hang out with and was a serious power house beer man. I couldn’t keep up with him in the bars, but I think I had him on the roads. He has invited some of us to Uganda for an “unofficial” tour.









Art and Colleen – Shawn’s parents. Really nice folks that I enjoyed talking with from time to time out on the balconies.

Shawn – Shawn is about my age, but much better looking. He’s also a better rider and he was definitely the craziest rider of the group.

My Quick and Dirty BMW R 1200 ST Review:

First and foremost this was a great bike to rent, but I would not buy one. It was fairly comfy but even for a short guy my legs got a little cramped from time to time. As you read about the trip you will note I started to have severe problems with pain in my left arm that were probably a combination of carpal tunnel, pushing the bike through the twisties, and the buzziness of the engine. I still enjoyed the bike a lot and there weren’t many other choices that I would have made.

The engine is the standard boxer engine that BMW is famous for. I guess it’s a love / hate relationship but I just wasn’t that impressed. It always felt like I was lugging the engine (maybe I wasn’t) at anything less than 4000rpm, and anything above 5000rpm was very buzzy. So there was a tiny sweat spot that I had to be in for it to feel “right.” It didn’t have as much power or torque as my ‘Priller.

The gear box was clunky and if the engine was cold you had to play with the clutch to get it into first gear. From there I caught a few false-neutrals that irritated me. The bike is geared tall and with the low power from the engine it meant I was mostly in 2nd gear for most of the trip through any twisties. A few times I had to downshift to 1st gear if I wanted to get a good drive off the hairpins and getting into 3rd meant I was moving pretty good. I would have geared the bike down just a bit to make it more useable in the mountains.

Handling was pretty good, but it felt heavy when moving it through the corners. It was, however a very stable bike on the straights – even at high speeds. I am not sure if I liked the Telelever front end or not. The bike definitely didn’t dive much when you got hard on the brakes, but that is also a technique that is utilized to increase corner speed on sharp turns and I think I use that unconsciously. The chassis was a bit too softly sprung for the riding we were doing as any inconsistencies in the pavement upset the line of the bike. This is a bonus if you want to increase the pucker factor while leaned over in a corner while staring off a 1000+ foot drop off.

The brakes were partially linked, servo assisted and had ABS. Let me say that I don’t see myself ever buying a bike that has this. The front brake operated the front brakes and partially the rear brake (this is linked braking). The rear pedal only applied the rear brake. However, both brakes were servo assisted. If the bike wasn’t running or the computer didn’t have time to run its diagnostics the brakes barely worked. When they did work I thought they were a bit mushy but did have a fairly linear feel that I liked. I never engaged the ABS even though I was hard on the brakes a few times.

I loved having the saddle bags and again it was a great bike to rent. I am just too used to my ‘Priller and riding true sport bikes for this bike to appease me enough to buy one.

Day 1 - Greetings from the Tin Can Man!
Munich, Germany

Or at least that is what I felt like today. I left for Germany at approximately 10:00am CMT. My flight actually took off at 12:15. Nothing unusual getting to Canada. Then I had a three hour layover in which I met a real nice guy named Peter. Peter was studying to be a brewmeister and had just graduated. He also is from Germany, but went to school in Palo Alto, Ca. So he is telling me all about these beers, and those beers, and I am thinking “this is a guy I need to know!”

Needless to say the flight to Germany was long, but fairly uneventful. However, I don’t sleep well on airplanes and when the sun started coming up at 1:00am MST you can imagine it just made sleeping impossible. Interestingly enough, the German’s are very relaxed when it comes to entering their country. No declaration forms, no hassles, no B.S. Welcome to Germany!!

I had to grab about 1.5 hrs of sleep before I met the group to go get our bikes. I was still tired so I didn’t feel like riding much before I went back to the hotel. It’s been a long day. Two hours sleep in more than 24 hours at this point. I am about to sack out and get some zzzzzz’s for the ride tomorrow.

There are 22 people in our group and a few are riding two up. We rented all kinds of BMW bikes and spent most of the evening and dinner discussing what we ride, where we ride, etc. We are all looking forward to the ride tomorrow!!

A few quick notes:
The Europeans here don’t believe in A.C. Forget it. It’s hot and humid and a bit on the uncomfortable side.
The Europeans here don’t believe in ice. They look at you like you are high if you ask for it.
I saw more Aprilia motorcycles today in the hour I walked around than I have seen in the last year.
It’s very green and pretty here.
There are motorcycle shows on the T.V. – which I can’t understand a single word, but I watch them anyway.

Day 2 - Keeping the Shiny Side Up in Europe
Munich – Rothenburg, Germany – 296.7km

Today was our first day of real riding. Most of the people elected to go off in smaller groups of two or three bikes. Since I was riding for my first time in Europe, and on an unfamiliar bike, I elected to go with the “group.”

That turned out to be good and bad. Good from the perspective that I didn’t really have to worry about reading directions and it allowed me to concentrate more on learning the road signs and driving habits of European drivers. BTW – they are much better drivers than we are!!!

Bad because there were some people in the group that, in my opinion, should not have been here. Not so much from an inexperienced perspective, but because…well….let’s face it, they suck as riders. The tour guides asked me to hang in back to keep an eye on everyone and it wasn’t necessarily pretty.

At least one other person and I got left behind on two different occasions and had to try to find the group again. Fortunately, the tour guide was also back-tracking trying to find us so it worked out in the end. But it was REAL slow going. For those of you who ride bikes you will know what I mean when I mention folks that slow down for every corner or cross the center stripe because they can’t keep their bike in their own lane. It also rained on us. For a small period of time it poured down rain and even hailed on us some. We were able to get the rain gear on so that we weren’t totally soaked, but it sucked for a while nonetheless.

Now, that’s not to say all is bad! I had an awesome time viewing the countryside!!! Germany is very green and for all the people that live here, they seem to be concentrated in the larger towns. Most of Germany is wide open with lots of forests or farm lands. Unfortunately, I didn’t have anyone riding on the back so I couldn’t get photos of the general landscape.

Speaking of people riding on the back, there are a few (very few) people who I really wish were here with me having a good time. The company would have been well received. I am sure we would be having a blast together, but perhaps there will be another trip.

All of the German people I have ran into so far have been very friendly and kind. Most of them speak English to some degree so the language barrier is not as much of an issue as I originally thought it might be. It’s very warm here this time of year, though, and there is no A.C. to be found. I take a shower to get the old sweat off so the new sweat has a place to stick.

The towns are absolutely beautiful and I find the architecture to be very simplistically European in nature. It’s interesting, though, that you can have a barn / farm right in the middle of town with cows and John Dere tractors running around. Almost as if the towns were built around them. Again, no photos and my apologies.

Speaking of cows, let’s talk about chickens and cows. This morning we had breakfast (awesome I might add) and I noticed that the eggs were somewhat orange (post-cooking). Another guy had a poached egg and it was orange as well. Then the cows we smelled coming through town didn’t smell like normal cows. I spent plenty of time in the country and I know what cow shit smells like. This was German cow shit. It just didn’t smell right somehow. I am not sure what is going on with the livestock over here, but it’s definitely slightly different than what we have back home.

And how about this - automatic toilet seats that clean themselves? One of the coolest things. You push a button and this little motorized whizmo (technical term) pops out of the tank with a sponge and some sanitation fluid. The seat then spins around to wipe itself off. I found this highly entertaining, of course.

On a break in some small town near Rothenburg we were shooting photos and having coffee when the Germans won their third match in the World Cup. The whole town erupted and for hours there were people singing in the streets and having spontaneous parades with cars whizzing by that had people hanging out of them with German flags. How is it our folks burn the town down, loot and riot when their team wins and the Germans seem to know how to have a good time without hurting anyone or vandalizing anything?

We had to eat fast to catch the “night watchman” tour of the town. It was very informative with regards to the history, but there were so many people we ended up splitting off and shooting photos and trying various beers. Grasshopper – if you are reading this we toasted you in a beer garden this evening. Nobody gave us overtly funny looks even though I yelled “Grashopper.” I guess the Germans expect a certain amount of weirdness from tourists.

My body clock is still messed up, so even though it’s almost 1:00am here, my body is not quite ready for sleep. Still I will try….because tomorrow we have a long day ahead of us. I won’t be in the main pack anymore because I would have to beat my head against a wall to suffer through it. A few of us will be taking off to hit the more sporty routes.

Until tomorrow….

Day 3 - A Much Better Ride
Rothenburg – Heidelberg, Germany – 296.7km

Well I still can’t seem to get online and I am a bit behind on writing, but I had a much better time today. I hooked up with three other riders apart from the main group. Two guys, John and Mike, and a girl named Liz (she is married, don’t even think it!).

Mike rides like I do, which is to say that we are here and let’s ride the crap out of these bikes. John doesn’t like the fast hard-core stuff and Liz seems to like it, but she is learning. That is OK…everyone has to learn sometime, right?

We ended up doing a pretty good ride and saw a lot of beautiful German countryside. Castles were literally “popping up” out of the countryside and we followed several riverbeds and streams. Not a whole lot of twisties, but some definitely fun routes. We got lucky a couple of times because we would be cruising at 140kmph and then about when we would slow down to enter a town we would see the police. So we definitely avoided some tickets, there.

To those of you who don’t ride bikes – I’ll keep mentioning “the twisties” as we like to call them. What are they? They are the roads that twist back and forth like a cork screw. If you have ever drove in mountainous terrain then you probably know what I am talking about. Some bikers love them, some hate them. Since I ride sport bikes, I love them. And I have a feeling that we will get our fair share, soon.

We also had a nice lunch at a café where nobody spoke English. We made out the menus as best we could and pointed at the items. The food was most excellent. I had some type of smothered ham and mushrooms with snitzel. It was nice to sit outside at the café and enjoy a refreshing lunch.

A short detour was made to an old castle. It was pretty interesting and I wondered what it must have been like a few hundred years ago. I can’t believe that they were able to get up and down the narrow staircases with all of their armor and / or garments on. I am not exactly huge and I had a pretty hard time navigating the staircases. Still, the view from the top was pretty incredible.

We finally arrived in Heidleberg and stayed at a wonderful hotel. It was in a “courtyard” area which was built around an old church. The only thing I didn’t like about the town is that it had way too many tourists (that is the pot calling the kettle black, eh?). And again, no A.C. We sat outside of the Hard Rock café listening to American rock, eyeballing the eye candy and tossing back a few cold ones. I did some shopping for some folks back home but I had the problem that the shops wouldn’t ship the items back to the U.S. or it was all your standard tourist crap. Mom and my niece will have to wait.

Now that I think about it, I am actually writing this on Day 4 and I still haven’t bought anything for myself or anyone else as of yet. I guess I better get busy on buying some souvenirs. The problem is that I don’t have room in my luggage for much and my mom and niece get priority.

Keeping the shiny side up in Europe…..

Day 4…
Heidelberg, Germany – Ottrott, France – 342.3km

I made it to France!!!! But…it was my worst riding day yet. I stayed out way to late with the boys partying and having a good time. I wasn’t hung over, but we went to bed about 1:00am and my body woke up at 5:00am. I just couldn’t concentrate very well on so little sleep. See there is this thing called the sun. And there is this other stuff called A.C. I had to have the windows open because there was no A.C., but there was plenty of sun at 5:00am.

Then Liz was running way behind. I waited for her and everyone else took off in their own groups. John and Mike said they would wait at the gas station, but we were so far behind they were long gone when we got there.

And we couldn’t get out of the gas station! It was a bunch of one-way streets that led us all over creation and back before we could get back to the main road. So just trying to get out of town put us almost 2 hours back!

Liz and I skipped several of the side-trips and made up as much time as possible. I was really having problems because I was so fatigued. I also was reading the route maps because I was leading Liz. That requires far more concentration that I wanted to expend but we kept going.

Axel, one of our guides, told us that we would get lost today and we did. A bunch. For whatever reason, once you come into France they can’t put up signs where signs should be. So you would be booking along a road just fine and get to a town. Then you would lose the road. So you would try to find it…..and you did this by just randomly trying different roads until you finally found a sign or stopped and asked for directions. We probably burned a total of 1.5 hours dicking around in the towns trying to find the roads leading out of the towns. In some cases, we found other roads that we could see on the maps and took them instead. That combined routes 1 (easy route), route 2 (harder route) and the Brad and Liz route (most f’d up route).

Since Liz and I were so lost and trying to make up time we finally ended up stopping in the La Petite Pierre Nord region of France and having a nice picnic lunch of fruit, bread and cheeses. We even had a lovely view of the town. Sounds pretty romantic doesn’t it?

Did I mention this was from the curb-stop in a parking lot of a grocery store? See, everything was closed. The French obviously don’t believe in having any place to eat open past about 1:00pm and it was almost 3:00pm. My blood sugar was so low I thought I might literally pass out. So we just hit the store and bought a few things and munched them down in the parking lot.

I then had a thought. It takes a certain kind of person to ride motorcycles. It takes another breed of person to ride motorcycles and go on adventures like this one. And it takes yet another kind of person to get totally freaking lost in France and make a picnic lunch in a parking lot of a grocery store and actually enjoy it. Maybe it’s because I was starving to death?

So Liz and I high-tailed it out of there and got lost a few more times before finally running across another rider that we knew. He had already been to the hotel and was back out for a quick flog on the bike. He never found the roads he was supposed to be on, but we figured it out and ended up on the Tour De France route into Obernai!! It was one of the sweetest roads I had ridden in many years. I believe this is road 704 out of Mollkirchen and then route 204 from Klingenthal to Obernai.

The only problem was that I was running on fumes and didn’t know if I was going to make it. The fuel light came on with almost 50km left in the tank. No problem….except the French also don’t have gas stations in their towns. I don’t know where they gas up, but we went through at least six towns without any gas. Then we found one and it was closed. I then found a Texaco sign and headed towards it only to find out there was no gas. WTF? But I arrived at the hotel with 3km left on the tank and knew I could make it until the morning to gas up.

The hotel here is beautiful and I will try to include some pics later. They also have A.C.!!! BTW – the French servants are very rude and difficult to deal with. The folks in the little towns were very friendly and helped us out tremendously throughout the day.

We weren’t the only ones that got lost. EVERYONE got lost on that route. Some took it better than others. One guy went down on the bike, but it was in a mud bank. I don’t even think his pride was hurt. Me, I was riding too slow to get hurt – I couldn’t concentrate to ride fast.

I am crashing early to get some rest!

Day 5….a Rest Day!
Rest Day in Ottrott, France – 220.7km

No rest for the wicked!!! Several of us got up and rode with Axel this morning for a most excellent flog through some of the best roads I have ever ridden. The group was moving fast and furiously through some of the most heinous ball busting twisties I have ever seen. One rider bowed out after the first 15 minutes because he couldn’t keep up (he ended up having a great day).

We rode fast and hard through all kinds of terrain up into a ski area somewhere around Le Bezouard. There we had a lovely lunch of crepes while many sport bikes went by. It was cool, almost cold and we finally headed down the mountain.

Mom – stop reading here!!! Skip the next paragraph or two!!

Some of the riders were good, some were fast, but only a few were fast and good. For the most part, these were definitely the most skilled riders in the group. I was asked to take the rear again and did so until after lunch at which time we all felt like we were pretty comfy and I went up to the front (about 2 bike of the leader). I almost ate it on a turn when I was pretty deep into a corner with the bike nearing maximum lean and I hit some sand or gravel. The bike stepped out on me and I had a serious case of pucker factor going on. Fortunately I pulled it back in and got through the corner just fine.

I also saw a guy almost get creamed by a tour bus on a hairpin turn. He rode wide of the center line before the turn to set it up (so he was in the wrong lane) and the bus almost took him out. I hope he learned his lesson. I was almost taken out by a bus in MY lane…the bus was in it’s lane plus ½ of mine. Yes, the turns were that sharp!! If you ride, imagine looking through the apex of the turn back, behind you and either uphill or downhill. It was pretty wild. Grashopper, if you are reading this, you would have hated the ride today. For me, it was great!!!!

I did a little shopping in town, but again I couldn’t find anything that would make a good gift.

I gotta get some rest, it’s a long day back into Germany tomorrow. Goodbye to Obernai.

Day 6
Ottrott, France – Titisee, Germany – 305km

Nice day riding out of France. We didn’t have as many navigational issues as we had before. One thing is for sure, the women are better looking in Germany than France. I didn’t care much for France other than the twisties that were offered up. The people were borderline rude (ever been to NYC?). It smelled better than Germany, but it just didn’t impress me that much.

We played in the twisties in the morning and then crossed back into Germany by the afternoon. Arriving in Titisee was interesting as we came down through a mountain pass by a lake. There were some good picture taking opportunities but I was moving too quickly to stop for fear of being ran over.

The group I was riding with had to put in some extra miles after the day ride. For the most part, with the exception of day one, I have ridden the longer, more sporty routes on all of the days. At some points we were hitting 160kmh on the straights before jamming on the breaks and dropping the bike into a corner.

Titisee was really pretty and we had a nice buffet style dinner before heading down the strip to check out the local bars and brews. We met some local women and sat up until the wee hours of the morning enjoying the company and beverages. One of the guys I was with, Shawn, thought he had a chance of getting lucky with the locals, but she was married and was not going to stray very far.

Unfortunately, it was another hot hotel room and I left the windows open – which pretty much meant that I had to wake up at 4:30am and it made me very tired for the next day. Stupid me, I didn’t get any souvenirs in France.

Day 7
Titisee, Germany – Lucerne, Switzerland – 230.7km

WOW! What a great ride. I slowed it down today from being tired and lead a small group of four people through some heinous twisties before hitting the straights into Switzerland.

Some of these roads require being very cautious on. Imagine one of our roads that is only 1.5 lanes wides (total for the road) and hairpin curves with cars, truck, and tour busses waiting for you around the corner (which you cannot see through).

Heading into Switzerland was no big deal, but the ride was very nice and I was able to give up my leadership to a couple that was riding two up. She was reading maps and our guide book while he had a map on the tank. I call it cheating, but it worked quite well.

The drivers in Switzerland were not as nice as the drivers in Germany. The Germans are much more courteous drivers and would give way to the bikes. In Switzerland they wouldn’t try to kill you (like back home), but they weren’t quite as willing to let you ride on by.

The worst part of the day was trying to get to the hotel! Lucerne is a big city with lots of traffic. They had the street getting to the hotel blocked off for a significant period of time. We had to circle and wait (some folks were waiting up to two hours) before they opened the street up and we could get to the hotel.

Tired, and hungry we made the bars and dinner before crashing early to get a good nights rest.

Day 8
Rest Day in Lucerne, Switzerland - 320.6km!!

It was a rest day so I spent it resting on the bike!!! The best of the best of the group went on this ride which netted us two mountain passes. We were shooting for four of them, but two of the passes were closed. One was closed due to rock slides and one was closed due to construction of the road.

Still we managed to hit two very nice passes. Remember what I said about France and the twisties? Forget it. The Swiss Alps are it. Hairpin after hairpin, under, over, behind, you name it and the road went that way with drastic elevation changes.


The guys were riding really quick today. If you weren’t dragging or scraping some part of the bike you weren’t riding fast and hard enough. We ground foot pegs, saddlebags and one guy even got a cylinder head!!! For those non-motorcyclists that might are reading this you have to lean a bike into a curve. The faster through the curve and the shaper the turn the more you have to lean the bike in. As you lean the bike further and further one of two things will happen – you will either break your tire loose and the bike will come out from under you (called a low-side) or you begin to put those lower parts on the pavement. So when I say we were scraping pegs, I mean we were literally grinding them off on the asphalt as we came around the corners. I was finally starting to feel the effects of being on a bike and riding the roads we had been riding. I had some sharp pains through my shoulders and down my left arm. It wasn’t enough to keep me from riding, but it was enough to keep me from riding quite as fast as the tour leader and two of the other guys (I later heard that he never takes folks as fast as we were pushing the pace). Still, I had a great freaking ride!! Taking passes at 9000+ feet with hairpins and sharp drop offs really wakes you up!

It was a tough 320km, but I would definitely do it again. After getting back we had some beverages and then went out for dinner. Italy won a game of the World Cup and the plaza square in Lucerne went ballistic. It was quite entertaining to be there.

One guy in our group got pretty hosed on wine and we ended up going out afterwards. His friend dared him to mess with this Asian prostitute, but only to mess with her. Turns out, the she was a he and everyone was in on the joke except this guy that we knew (sorry, no names just in case) Now, I would never do that to anyone but it was already in full swing by the time I came along. Needless to say we were in tears laughing a few tables over while he was putting the moves on the she/he. The she/he even had it’s his/her hands up our friend’s shorts a few times. We were losing it about this point. His friend finally stopped it all by telling him and thankfully took it very well.

We then went to a place of “ill repute.” I am not sure if this is legal or not but this place was a brothel. Drinks were very expensive and the ladies wanted us to buy Champagne for them at $25.00 a glass. The standard proposition appeared to be $200 (francs) for a ½ hour. I told them no way and I left, but a few of the guys stayed behind. What happened? Who knows for sure!!!

I can’t say that Lucerne did much for me, but apparently it was picked so that the ladies could get some quality shopping time in. To me, the little towns and villages that we passed through were much more interesting, warm, and a pleasure to ride through and see.

Day 9
Lucerne, Switzerland – Warth, Austria – 284.7km

Man! Another great day of riding. It’s amazing to me that we are getting day after day of good riding. I hooked back up with Mike, John and Sean to tear it up in the twisties some more before getting out of the mountains.

We had some more of the roads that I really didn’t like – that’s the ones that are about 1.25 lanes wide with a lot of blind corners. I still kept coming around them and almost got squeezed off the road a few times. Maybe I had more room than I thought, but it was pretty sketchy.

The three of us stopped several time and took plenty of pictures crossing the borders of Switzterland, Austria and through the country of Liechtenstein. Liechtenstein is the smallest country in Europe. Blink and you will miss it!!

We even stopped and something to drink while Mike got his camera battery charged. There were a lot of cute European hotties walking around and of course we were all geared up and smelling pretty ripe. I think I may just have to burn my jacket after this trip.

A last stop was made to try to catch the toboggan run heading into Warth, but we had wasted too much time and didn’t get to make it. So we made our own “run” by taking some photos and goofing off for a few minutes. Even here, John was still lagging behind.

We played some more on the longer route and took our time coming into Warth. It was hysterical because John was really lagging behind. He hates the twisties and high altitude passes. We gave him a pretty hard time, but the best was when he took off ahead of us so we could get some photos. We caught him pretty quick and there was a dump trunk behind him with it’s break lights on!! John was getting schooled in the twistes by a dump trunk!! You can imagine that we gave him a ton of shit about that one.

The place we stayed that night was Jager Alps and it rocked. It’s a ski resort in the middle of nowhere. Very warm and cozy with a great bar and, great atmosphere and good people. Definitely one of may favorite places on the trip. We had Jagermeister shots after the ride and Axel taught us how to do it properly. You open the bottle of Jager, put the lid on your nose and then shoot the bottle without the lid falling off your nose. I guess we looked pretty silly, but that is OK with me. You only go around once.

That evening I caught wind that some folks on the tour were unhappy with either the tour, Axel, or all of the above. I couldn’t quite figure that out because everyone that I talked with was having a most excellent time. I think there was just one or two people that are very picky and likely to complain about anything. One of the most vocal complainers was even saying how happy he was with the trip, so this was all a bit odd to me.

Ahh….open the windows….cold air….and cowbells tinkling like wind chimes all night. Not a bad way to sleep.

Day 10
Warth, Austria – Sauerlach, Geramany – 244.8 km

I suppose it would be fitting that our last day of riding would end with some rain. Still, I fell pretty fortunate that we didn’t get much and really had nice conditions for the entire trip. There was a tornado in the mountains with golf-ball sized hail, but we never saw any of it.

I was really feeling the effects of riding every day on a sportier bike. The engine vibration, the ergonomics and the miles finally took their toll and I just didn’t have it in me to push myself or the bike anymore. A really nice couple named Keith and Katy let me follow them into Sauerlach for the “ride home.”

Aside from a little bit of rain, Austria was another really pretty country. We even stopped to check out the “Disneyland” castle of Neuschwantstein. We never went inside as the tour would take over three hours.

Lunch was another fabulous picnic lunch on the shoreline of a lake. The water was a brilliant aqua color that we normally don’t see here in the U.S. You could see down about ten feet into the water before the bottom dropped out of view.

I even maxed out the BMW on the Autobahn. I got it up to somewhere around 230 ~ 240kmph (142.6 ~ 148mph) before it wouldn’t go any faster. That’s still not as fast as my Aprilia, but it’s plenty fast. Scary to think we could clip along at 160+kpmh and a Porche would blow by you like you were standing still.

It’s true that you can fly on the Autobahn, but that doesn’t mean that you can ignore the warnings and signs. You have to pass on the left, and the speed limits can dynamically change depending on the road conditions ahead. So you had to stay pretty aware and alert lest ye be taken out by someone else. It’s too bad that in the U.S. we couldn’t have a highway system like this because it made getting between cities really fast. The U.S. drivers would kill each other on it and I’m not sure the legal system could handle all the lawsuits that would erupt.

Dinner was nice and we all had some time to say our goodbyes with some last few drinks at the bar. Several of us plan on staying in touch and riding together when we can. I even have a hook up in Austria for skiing and boarding, now. Maybe next year.

Would I do it all again? You bet!!!

Day 11 & 12 – The Trip Home

Well, it ain’t over until the fat lady sings….or so they say. She definitely was not singing for me yesterday. We got up early to make our flights out of Germany. Our in-bound flight was delayed out of Canada due to thunderstorms. Knowing that the pilots could make time up in the air those of us that had a four hour layover we weren’t very concerned . Then we get on our plane and it gets delayed due to storms in Germany. Not much you can do about the weather, but now we are questioning whether or not we’ll make it on time.

After 10 hours on the flight, they parked us on the tarmac and wouldn’t let us off the plane because there weren’t any gates available. We finally get in only to find that ALL of the flights have been cancelled….supposedly due to weather.

Now as most of you know I travel quite a bit. And I am certainly empathetic to weather delays. But why were ALL the flights cancelled so early in the afternoon? If the weather was so bad, why wasn’t Air Canada getting extra flights ready to go and getting some additional agents at the airport to help everyone?

I was on hold for over 20 minutes to finally find out I couldn’t get home until July 1st….roughly 2.5 days out. Unbelievable. No apologies, no assistance with hotels or anything just a nice “do you want the flight or not?”

So I took it and tried to find alternate ways home. I finally got into the hotel in Canada about 1:00am after traveling for 20-some-odd hours. I was beat. So what happens? Tex, a guy that was part of our group and on the same flights, gets a flight out 1st thing in the A.M.!!!!! I called Air Canada back only to hear the “it was luck of the draw” bullshit and then I started calling them every hour until they got me setup on a 6:45pm flight back to DFW. Now I am in the airport typing this and my flight is yet again delayed.

In all of this time not ONE time has an Air Canada agent apologized for the inconvenience (even after telling them this), offered a meal voucher or anything. I have heard this is not unusual for this airline. My advice to you is to avoid them like that neighbor that always borrows tools and never returns them. Avoid them like the barfly chick you see every weekend and mysteriously always seems to have a cold sore. Avoid them at all cost. I will have to write a letter to them when I get home (if I ever make it) and see what, if anything, they will offer up to compensate for the hassles.

Seeing as how I had to kill time in Canada, I slept in very late and then went to the Lose Moose (what a great name) for a beer and some lunch. The FILA World Cup was on and the bar was packed at 11:30am. I didn’t know the Canadians were so into football / soccer, but that is cool.

As I said, here I sit….at the airport….killing time and drinking beer while waiting to see if my flight is ever going to leave. Wish me luck!

Made it back!!!

Well I am finally home. My last three hours to get home took over thirty thanks to the ineptitude of Air Canada. So I got in early this morning instead of early last night. It was about 1:30am by the time I got here and about 2:00am by the time I crawled in bed. Heck, my friends didn't even pick me up from the airport and I still couldn't make it home before the next day. My body is all screwed up with regards to time.

Anyway, I am working on the pics and all of that and will be uploading it all over the next day or so. Stay tuned.